My pet-peeves

I've decided to make a list of my pet-peeves. Enjoy. (This serves no purpose in helping me become a better writer, but w/e)

• Fundamentalists, of any kind. If you have any fundamentals I hate you. I even include reading fundamentalists, since you're the true enemy
• Liars. Really? You won a triathlon? But, you're 400 pounds, how did you do it? Oh, it's just water weight. Well then, that makes sense
• People that get upset that there isn't more bilingualism in America. Seriously, we're Americans, we don't need to know crap. You know why, because we have a friend, his name is Abraham *slaps down $5 bill*...ya don't know him
• Fat people. I don't mean normal fat people, you know, the ones who are just fat, but thats ok, life goes on. I hate the ones that flaunt their fat flabs, make all these jokes about how they can't do something because they're fat, and sit next to other fat people when they know there's an open seat a little bit down the way. Effin' fatties
• People with those bluetooth ear thingies. First, I can't tell who's normal psycho or stupid anymore. Plus, do these people know how dumb they look with those things? Well, trust me, you look like an idiot
• People that wear sunglasses inside. It's okay to wear them at night (so you can, so you can see), but inside you just look like a der-der-der
• Life-lessons. I hate life-lessons. I really hate it when people try to tell you what life-lesson you should learn from dropping a penny down a sewage drain. Them:"You know, if you hold on tightly to the things you love, you won't - " Me: "SHUT UP! I'll get another penny, hold on to it real tight and then shove it down your throat if you don't shut the crap up!"
• People that tell you jokes they read in e-mail forwards or online. Honestly, if it's online, that means its crude, unintelligible garbage.
  
• When people think everything always means something positive. Somehow they exist, which is another reason I think Darwin is an idiot, because you would think those people would be weeded out by now
• Halloween. I've never understood it. First, why are all of these city-dwellers celebrating a harvesting holiday? Second, why do they get dressed up for it? Third, why do parents, who tell their children never to take candy from strangers, let their kids go out armed with only a flashlight and let their children take candy from strangers? I think this holiday should be re-named "Confuse Your Child" Day, since he/she will obviously now think cross-dressing is fine, strangers are trustworthy, and you can now extort adults for what you want
• Easter. No, seriously, what does candy and bunnies have to do with Jesus? Honestly...
• Those complaining liberal types (See: Audience at the Daily Show). I mean, really, just shut the crap up
• Trying to explain your not racist, and pointing out your friends that are of the race you supposedly hate. That in itself is racist, but it should be able to prove the point that you're not racist. How the crap do I prove I'm not racist??!? (or sexist or...whatever)
• The senator that accused the Comptroller General of being partisan. Hey, n00b, he's answering a negatively-worded question for a person who knows the answer is going to be bad. Give him a break
• People that are smart, but misspell simple words. I don't mean the way I misspell, getting the same two words confused (your/you're), I mean only the only word that they mean is that word, and they just don't know how to spell it
• Sam Kinison. Why was he famous? Honestly? His comedy was, ehh...and I couldn't understand most of what he said because he was always YELLING!

Thats about it. I have more, but I don't want to seem like I'm judgemental. haha