Question of the Every Other Day, 7-2-06

Question: What is the meaning of life?

Answer:
The meaning of life is simple: Never figure out the meaning of life. Of course, this places the entire human existence into quite the quandary. If the meaning of life is to never figure out the meaning of life, doesn't that mean we've figured it out, and have therefore shown that the meaning of life for humans to be a fallacy? The short answer is yes. The long answer to this is Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssssssss.
Life is certainly mysterious to us humans. Seems as if right when we think we've got the answer to life, it turns out we don't. I personally think God has done this on purpose, and we will forever be his little ant farm. Let's hope we're not truly created in the image of God, if so he might do what all little boys have done and turn the ant farm upside down, shake out the ants and kill the as they try to escape. It could be God is already trying to do this, however, and the melting of the ozone is simply his magnifying glass with which to burn us to death.
I, however, digress. Back to the meaning of life. Our meaning is to never know the bigger meaning. If life were a definition in a dictionary, we'd have the second definition all picked out, which is Life means to know nothing, but think we know almost everything. The first definition is one I will not even attempt to answer in a serious, scholarly manner. Suffice it to say that it probably has a lot of big words, and it might even be a run-on sentence.
The true meaning of life is probably something beyond the grasp of humans. The true meaning of life is akin to the remote control on a hot summer's day: too far for us to get off the coach for fear of losing our cool spot.
Here is a list of some other ideas for the meaning of life, and why I think they're wrong:

• To perform acts of goodwill
• This just takes too much effort. Besides, I think God is more of a thinking man's Man, and goodwill is more of a do-er activity
• Perform miracles
• Miracles are sort of played out by now. Don't we have computers that can do that stuff for us?
• Get closer to God
• God has a pretty big personal space bubble, he's not the touchy-feely type
• Have children (propagate human existence)
• I think 6 billion is sort of enough, don't you?